After nearly ten years on Progressive Radio Network, I suspect you know that I have a deep belief: your sexuality matters! My friend and colleague, Dr. Linda de Villers (www.drlindadevillers.com) has he very same belief. We’ve both recently returned from conferences – Linda’s WORLD ASSOCIATION for SEXUAL HEALTH (WAS) held last month in Mexico City, and mine QUAD-S (Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality) meeting last week in Denver. We had conversations about two of the presenters: Dr. Ellen Laan (WAS) and Dr. Meredith Chivers (Quad-S). A few points from Dr. Laan’s talk included that sexual pleasure is a very gendered embodied affair, that women have four times as much testosterone than estrogen, that sex for reproduction occurs about 1% of the time (the other 99% for pleasure), that focus is way too much on penises(fingers work better), that lesbians do better with regard to orgasms (vaginal – again fingers, not dildos), and gender differences on the decline. Conclusion: we are all from Mars. Meredith Chivers is leading the Canadian effort to give women a better orgasm. She and other researchers are increasingly using eye-trackers, brain scanners to get a direct look at our brains --  our largest sex organ. Heterosexual women’s genitals become aroused from lesbian sex to copulating bonobo apes, and more. Female sexuality is more fluid. Vaginal flow and lubrication does not always mean a woman feels subjectively aroused. It may be adapted to react to sexual violence – lubricating to protect delicate tissues from injury. Men who say, “If you’re wet, you must want it,” are buying into a misogynist myth. Distraction is also studied: it may well be that distraction correlates with sexual dysfunctions such as distressingly low desire and arousal. Mindfulness may work as a bridge to sexual awareness. Sexuality is a window into one of the greatest human mysteries: communication between the mind and the body – and how we can better align the two. Tune in for so much more!

 

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