Love, Lust, and Laughter

Love, Lust and Laughter - 09.16.20

“Sex Gets Complicated During the Pandemic” is the CNN Health headline. The article was posted on Monday September 14, 2020, and features Dr. Diana and her sex advice book Love in the Time of Corona. The wonderful and articulate Dr. Carol Queen joined the program again. She is the Good Vibrations Staff Sexologist and the author of three books. The most recent is The Sex and Pleasure Book. The sex docs discussed non-sexual/sensate focus/full body caressing exercises. Dr. Carol is an expert on erotic talk: what do you want to say? (Narrate the plots of erotic stories; reminisce about a past sexy encounter; make requests to do specific sexual things). Furthermore, how do you want to say it? (Make a list of your preferred terms for erogenous body parts, and sex acts).

 

The CNN article notes that some are having more intimate, fun sex, and pushing boundaries. One way to do this is to introduce new and different sex toys. The sex toy industry reports a 250% spike in sales, selling more than 1 million toys since March! Dr. Diana’s advice for men in heterosexual relationships is to make friends with the toys. Some men are threatened or intimidated: “Why do you want or need a sex toy except to masturbate?” It’s fun to learn how to use different toys, especially in combination with other ways to stimulate her with your mouth, your hands, and your penis. Dr. Carol and Dr. Diana discussed how multiple points of stimulation can enhance the intensity of the orgasm even more! (Google “trigasm.”) These are great ways to reconnect with your partner. This pandemic is a stressful time, but you know what? It doesn’t have to be so stressful on your relationship.

Love, Lust and Laughter - 09.01.20

Once again Dr. Diana’s friend and colleague Dr. Lori Buckley (www.DrLoriBuckley.com) joined the show—this time to talk about the importance of play. In Dr. Diana’s book Love in the Time of Corona: Advice From a Sex Therapist for Couples In Quarantine, Chapter 6 is titled “Laugh and Play Together.” Dr. Lori asks her clients, “When was the last time you laughed together?” A great question! Studies show that couples who laugh together last together. Shared laughter has a positive effect on relationship satisfaction. And … laughter can lead the way to play because it’s the sidekick of play. We are absolutely hardwired to play. Actually, all animals in nature play. The best example are dolphins. They survive in a dangerous ocean by making play a priority every day, and they allow their offspring to play. They form protective circles so their young ones can play without worrying about sharks. Human children are masters of play! They just do what they enjoy: drawing, singing songs, building forts or making messes in the kitchen—and go at it with total enthusiasm.

 

Play is not so easy for some adults who feel like they are juggling many responsibilities—made more vivid by the pandemic. But we humans have an innate need for play. Play is vital for problem solving, creativity and joy! People who don’t give themselves time (or permission) to play are more likely to be anxious and depressed, experience less optimism, and may be more susceptible to unhealthy behaviors, like avoiding exercise or excessive drinking. Dr. Lori’s website www.StuffofLove.com features lots of ways to promote play! You will find a game Dr. Lori created: “CPR for Love” (Connection, Passion, Romance) with creative questions that will stimulate sexy conversations. The sex toys featured are selected and test-driven by Dr. Lori. Her product “Luv My Vulva,” when massaged into the vulva, can have an arousing, tingling effect. If you go to her website you’ll see that for all of September you will get 15% off: use Discount Code – LLLsave15. Tune into the program because Dr. Diana and Dr. Lori have lots of ideas for rekindling or increasing your sense of play!