Brad Coates (www.CoatesandFrey.com)  returned to the show. He knows all about marriage and divorce because he is a divorce lawyer in Honolulu, Hawaii and has written “DIVORCE with DECENCY” –  now in its 5th Edition. In 1972, 75% of all U.S. adults were married, but by a 2010 Census married couples comprised only 48% of all U.S. households. What are the causes and risk factors for divorce? Lack of communication is one: if a couple has experienced cheating, lying, neglect, or betrayal, they may want to throw dishes rather than sit down for a fireside chat. The birth of a first child is another: Gottman long-term studies show that two-thirds of the new parents were very unhappy. They treated each other with more contempt, belligerence, and sadness, as well as with less affection, humor, and empathy than did couples without children but married for the same amount of time. They also found that over the next year, hostility between partners increased dramatically, while the romance dissolved. Another risk factor is a lack of sex. Sexual satisfaction is one of the best predictors of overall happiness. Yet in one study, only 12% of couples reported not having “serious sexual problems” after having children. Brad points out that physical and sexual chemistry for both genders is often better in second marriages. Monogamy was also discussed. Oscar Wilde famously said, “Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.” Brad will return to the program August 15th for talk about the internet, social media, porn – as well as the rise of the “She Economy”…and more!  Tune in.

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David Steinberg (www.DavidSteinberg.us) has been writing about sexuality since 1989. His book “This Thing We Call Sex” is honest, funny, sometimes angry, but always profound. Dr. Diana and David discussed Fine Art Sexual Photography, something he has been doing since 1999. He photographs couples having sex, and he tells them to be themselves -- to have a good time, to be really there with each other. His sexual photographs have won numerous awards, including at the Seattle Erotic Arts Festival. Many couples experience transformations after viewing their photos: one woman, for example, confronted deep issues of how she felt about her body. She called the experience of the photo shoot one of the most important days of her life! If you might be interested in being photographed, you may contact David through his website. David Steinberg has well documented the American sexual landscape. Please tune-in for a fascinating interview!

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Dr. Sayed Shah, MD (www.mimqc.com), and Dr. Diana discussed how gut health impacts our sexuality – as well as other important aspects of our lives. One month ago Dr. Diana gave a keynote speech for Dr. Shah’s MANDALA INTEGRATIVE MEDICINE “Women’s Integrative Lifestyle Forum” in Iowa. The focus of this PRN interview was on how gut and sexual health are linked. Dr. Shah knows how important lifestyle changes are, giving the body tools, for real health changes. 80% of our immune system is impacted by and around our gut health. How do nutrition and food related concerns impact a good sexual life? How is the Standard American Diet (SAD) affecting sexual lives? Does gut bacteria regulate our sex hormones?  The old adage, “You are what you eat” could be reworded: “You are what your intestinal flora eat!” Dr. Shah’s observation is important: Health is a balance of mind, body, and spirit. Please listen for some potentially life-changing information!

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Dr. Lori Buckley – www.DrLoriBuckley.com – returned to the program. Her book is “21 Decisions for Great Sex & a Happy Relationship” which can be purchased on AMAZON. As Sex Therapists, Dr. Lori and Dr. Diana discussed their favorite sex tips, books, and sex toys. Here’s a flavor for the show: Compliment your partner. It will make him/her feel noticed, special, and appreciated. The more connected she feels, the more sexually inspired she’ll feel. Also, explore new regions…perhaps the back of her neck, the base of her spine. Sex becomes about discovery, not seeking some destination. The goal of this show is to inspire you to reconnect -- with yourself and your partner – and to suggest things you might do to put a little extra zest in your lovemaking. Some ask, “Who wants to work on sex? Isn’t it supposed to happened naturally?” No, sex is not a natural function; it’s a natural potential…It has to be developed, like reading, speaking a language or spirituality. You may be inspired by listening to Dr. Lori and Dr. Diana!

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Veronica Monet, a relationship and sexuality coach – www.TheShameFreeZone.com – returned to the program. Dr. Diana and Veronica explored codependency and body shame in more depth – having touched on these subjects May 9th. There are common misunderstandings about codependency; actually, it is more than being needy, dependent. The codependent patterns may include people pleasing and being a control freak. Future codependents naturally feel comfortable in relationships in which their needs are secondary or ignored, while feeling compelled to take care of someone else. Consequently, they will gravitate toward narcissistic or selfish people. To begin healing, assertive skills and healthy boundaries are necessary. Who am I? What do I need? Body shame was discussed in the second half of the show. How does a woman’s image of her body affect her sexuality – and her relationship with her partner? “Self-image neurosis” is often a way to avoid being sexual, an excuse not to abandon herself to another. She may lose her sensitivity to her partner and forgo pleasure. What to do about poor body image? A woman must cultivate the ability to appreciate her uniqueness, and start to see “imperfections” as endearing distinctions. Many people believe that self-hatred is a catalyst for change…What is necessary is to be deliberately  kind to oneself. Visit The Shame Free Zone because in about a week Veronica’s formula for Your Guide to Exquisite Partnership will be posted.  

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Dr. Jen Martin (www.drjen.net) interviewed Dr. Diana about low sexual desire, its prevalence, and the common reasons for it. Actually, it was a conversation between the two docs. What to do if you are the partner with lower sexual desire? How does it impact the partner with higher desire? What about the cultural conditioning on sexual desire?  All of these topics and more were discussed. Listen in because there is much contradiction and confusion around these topics.

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Veronica Monet, a relationship and sexuality coach – www.TheShameFreeZone.com – returned to the show. This time she and Dr. Diana spoke about Veronica’s focus in her workshops: Claiming your Erotic Birthright as a Woman. The topics included co-dependency (people-pleasing and control freaks); body image/body shame (very common…with lots of  on-the-air examples); and, the divine feminine (balancing masculine and feminine energies…the life energy that flows through the body and its energy centers. Channeling this energy and riding it to maximum pleasure is a worthwhile goal!). This in an inspiring, provocative program. Please tune in!

 

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Jill Angelo, Genneve CEO (www.Genneve.com), interviewed Dr. Diana on the subject of Aging, Sexuality and Menopause. Jill started Genneve because she was committed to creating quality products and wanted to foster a community where women can find information, conversation, and inspiration. This show contributed to those goals! A woman’s lack of interest can be both physically and emotionally inspired. Dr. Diana spoke of solutions; she knows about them personally and professionally. BHRT (Bio-identical Hormone Replacement Therapy) can help, so can talk therapy, and so can quality products like those produced at Genneve. Jill asked Dr. Diana how she addresses women who ask, “Is this it? Am I done? Is my life as a sexual being finished?” There was also a discussion about how sex can be very good for our health! And, what about sexual pain and body-image problems? These concerns – and more – were explored. Dr. Diana wants to see her clients restore emotional intimacy and reach their full sexual potential…Indeed, sex matters! Genneve’s products can help a lot: go to their website, or to AMAZON, or to Walgreens.com. The goal is to treat the whole woman and the relationship!

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Living entails experiencing the pain of loss – both our own and of those we care about. Continuing to live also means finding ways to go on. Dr. Diana and Dr. Lori Buckley (www.DrLoriBuckley.com) discussed relationship and life transitions – personally and clinically. Both docs have had partners/husbands who have died. Dr. Lori observed that either you fall into the void or you find meaning. A metaphor for life after loss is both powerful and apt: Think of it as a scattered jigsaw puzzle, where the pieces of one’s former life have been scattered and now must be reconfigured in a new way. Even smaller stressors can take their toll. The vast majority of us will be faced with one or more major traumatic stressors during a lifetime. Resilience can help with that. Dr Lori likes to focus “above the line” with more positive thoughts, mindfulness, and embracing change. Positivity expands awareness, begetting more positivity – more noticing, more engagement, more appreciation, and more trust. Little actions help build a reservoir of goodwill as we grieve, and keep our ongoing relationships replenished. This is an inspirational program!  

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There’s a reason fairy tale’s always end in marriage. It’s because nobody wants to see what comes after…it may be too grim. Brad Coates (www.CoatesandFrey.com) knows much about marriageand divorce, and is the author of “DIVORCE with DECENCY” – soon to be  in its Fifth Edition. Dr. Diana and Brad reviewed some of the factoids in his book, including, “Men are usually the first to say ‘I love you.’”  Perhaps this is because they are more romantic and want more non-sexual affection, stereotypes aside. “One-half of all divorces happen by year seven of the marriage”; indeed, the “seven-year itch.” There are anthropological reasons at play. “Marital satisfaction does increase with each successive year…once you have made it past the first twenty-five years.”  John Gottman, one of the nation’s leading marriage researchers, reports that older married couples tend to behave like younger married couples outside of the bedroom – with a sense of kindness. We discussed many other aspects of Brad’s book, a book that can save your marriage! Tune in to discover the details!

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